This series details the beginning and how I met him. The first two installments can be found here
I slid under his arm and rolled to the edge of the bed carefully placing my feet on the floor. A headache wracked my brain and unsteady balance was evident as I struggled to stuff one leg into rumpled jeans that had been haphazardly discarded the night before. I had been raised attending church every Sunday, bible camp in summer and youth group as a teen until pressure to” just be like everyone else” collided with alcohol and ended in confusion over self worth, desire and respect. I thought of mother and her disappointment while hopping towards the door. I pulled a shirt and jeans on until teetering finally gave way to collapse. A sigh made its way out of his mouth and then he rolled from side to side eventually settling back into sleep.
A small amount of interest had formed and overshadowed persistent concerns regarding his intentions and sincerity. But he seemed somehow different and had not pressured to be intimate but had pushed to develop a bond of mutual affection. My exit was quick and precise and the door shut quietly behind me.
Events from the previous semester seemed distant and for the first time in a month my mind was in the present not immersed in thoughts of Scott. I vowed that I would never open my heart to anyone again and instead would focus on goals of becoming a jazz vocalist. But there I stood in that tiny apartment next door to my sister’s place sneaking out in the early morning hours.
I knocked with a rap rap pattern, looking in between shabby half closed curtains. The door slowly opened and I crept in positioning myself on the couch in a slumping fashion. I had entered College apartments, number 3 just two doors down from this handsome man five years my senior. He was polite and clean cut, did not drink or smoke and studied engineering at a neighboring University. My sister had become an acquaintance during summer session and felt that he was just what I needed to lighten up and forget the past. Her eyes narrowed and she asked me why I was unwilling to give him a chance. Shoulders shrugged as I poured black coffee into a garage sale mug, placing my feet up on the plywood table. I lit another cigarette and reminded her of dreams and aspirations that needed my complete attention.