Grateful for the little things

Here in Idaho we have snow and ice, cold temperatures and blue skies! I love this kind of weather it reminds me of the house on the hill waking up to glistening snow on the trees and icicles that hung from the top deck. Childhood memories flood back and a warm sensation keeps me feeling safe and happy!

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I am ready to make another list of the things that I am grateful for. These are more specific to my progress with anxiety and daily functioning. Of course I am grateful for my parents, children, grandchildren and friends.  Some changes are small and others are huge, or at least they are for me. I hope that this inspires at least one person, makes them feel they are not alone and life does move forward!

  1. I am grateful that I can take still continue to take a full walk outside and enjoy it without anxiety!
  2. I am grateful that I can still cook a meal and have renewed my love for cooking.
  3. I am grateful that I can still clean the house without panicking.
  4. I am grateful for and to my blogging friends. The shame and guilt that I have carried is now in the light and thanks to each person who comments, likes and supports me in this journey I am able to feel more open and able to share! This is truly my special safe place! I am able to reveal more things that happened without fear.
  5. I am still not able to drive unless it is totally necessary but I feel I have made progress.
  6. I am grateful that I have continued blogging three times a week. Some days it is difficult to interact and while I miss my good friends sometimes I just want to stay isolated, but my goal of blogging three times a week has helped me to keep a normal schedule and routine in my daily life.
  7. I am grateful that I am back to eating more fruits and vegetables. Before he came I had lowered my cholesterol, lost weight and was lifting weights. After he left everything fell apart. We spent those three weeks staying out of the house,driving around town, eating fast food and not being mindful of health. It has taken me almost three years to get back on track!!!
  8. I am grateful for the forgiveness that I have given to myself. I forgave him, his wife, but never truly forgave me!!
  9. I am grateful that I can now see how I want to put my book together. I am working on it when I feel up to it.
  10. I am grateful that my mind is now clearing and I can process everyday life.
  11. I am grateful that I can feel joy even if it is fleeting.
  12. I am grateful that I am starting to care about me!IMG_20180307_081221

 

77 thoughts on “Grateful for the little things

  1. Lynn
    I am grateful that you are alive to share your life with us- or how would we know how one person could be so cruel to another human being.
    I am glad you have forgiven yourself and are not beating yourself anymore.
    I am glad your health goals are back on track.
    What is the price of divorcing him? Why can’t it be done ?
    Susie

    Liked by 1 person

    • I have thought of it so many times and have tried. First, he is not a resident of this state and so they might not be able to decide assets, custody etc. Second, basically he is not here and it will be hard to notify him and make sure he has been notified properly. Third really so much FEAR! HE always manages to convince everyone around him of anything! I have seen him convince family members, professional people regarding financial issues etc. So I am waiting for now and happy he has not come back. If he says he is coming I will file for divorce.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Wow Lynn that is hard! From what I’ve read, a person should never try to fight a narcissist in court without a good attorney who is experienced in dealing with that type of person. Like you said, they always manage to convince people in their favor. A relative had this problem, but with her awesome attorney, the judge saw right through him. Just something to keep in mind, hopefully this helps!
        Take care!
        Debra

        Liked by 2 people

  2. You’re doing great Lynz. Keep moving forward at your pace and minimize looking back There is a much brighter future and enhanced happiness as you progress in your life among your loving family and friends.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You’re doing great Lynz. Keep moving forward at your pace and minimize looking back There is a much brighter future and enhanced happiness as you progress in your life among your loving family and friends.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Little steps turn into big steps and then to leaps and bounds! The reason my handle is pricelessjoy is because I couldn’t feel joy for a long time then one day, I was so much better mentally that I finally felt joy and it was priceless! Big hugs Lynn!! xoxoxoxo

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Oh my dear sister, you are so worth forgiving yourself, you above everyone should carry no guilt for what he put you through, it was him, only him and he owns all the BS he put you through, I love this list…..I am so grateful for you….you have made my life fuller, made me a stronger woman, and have let me enjoy your wonderful family, watch the babies grow and just so grateful for all the smiles you have brought to my heart. You deserve nothing but happiness and peace…..keep writing, keep walking, keep cooking, drive with the windows down, wind blowing through your hair and the music up loud, please keep stepping forward head held high, you are worthy of love, happiness and anything you damn well want!!! Love ya sister…keep smiling……xxxkat

    Liked by 3 people

  6. You are a strong woman Lynz. Don’t be afraid of your strength. I am fully confident that a way will open for you to resolve your relationship issues whether they are legal or emotional. Wishing you all the best.

    Liked by 2 people

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