Riyadh 2006
Her smile had faded and stringy hair had been cut into one even line, but it was obvious she still existed. No modern styles were allowed and like the children, she would be summoned to sit in his chair and wait for scissors to chop and shape until this task was complete. Her skin had wrinkled and bits of grey washed through a dirty blonde but there was no mistaking, it was really her. A red shirt hung loosely over her chest and spots of bleach dotted her pants. The space was noticeable but only with a wide smile which could easily be avoided. It had been years, even decades since I really looked at her in the mirror.
His job ended and once again he would stay at home for 12 months looking for the perfect employment opportunity. Offers came and went but none were at the standard that he had become accustomed to. He held a U.S. passport which entitled him to benefits and a salary that were in line with his status. His frustration built with each passing day as he slept till noon, drank tea with friends and walked through the house making random inspections.
The balance that was kept when he was working had now come crashing down and although money had been saved and was plentiful, it was not to be touched. The boys were at University, children needed immunizations and our teeter totter balance could not be disrupted. Eating and drinking had become difficult and avoiding the fractured tooth that hung precariously was no longer possible. It wiggled and moved sending shooting pain along a rugged path that ended only to be agitated more frequently. One last warning was given and an offer to see the dentist. He was of course the best provider and always thought of his family first. I nodded my head in agreement, handing him the pliers and a tissue. He placed his hand firmly on my head and gripped the jagged piece of tooth ripping it loose.
I find it very hard to like this Lynn but my mood is lifted when I view all the lovely family photos.
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Thanks for caring and for liking it makes me feel heard! xxx
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OMG 😮
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Ouch! 😳
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IT felt much better when that piece was removed! I bit into something and it fractured. A tooth that had not been filled properly.
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Dental issues are miserable. Still, ouch! 😃
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yes they are! I finally had that tooth pulled two years ago and had a bridge put in.
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Much better, Im sure. 😃
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Yes😄
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OMG that must have hurt. I am pleased you moved beyond that more now.
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Thanks Joseph!
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You’re welcome
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I don’t think, that this monster ever have placed anyone near, where he placed himself. Monsters are like that. So great to have you in a much better place today, sister ❤
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Thanks sister xoxoxo
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Wow. Such torture. I have to go back and look at your family photos to remember that you survived hell and it is inspiring.
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Thanks so much xo
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Oh my god Lynn…Love and hugs to you. I am so happy you are free of this and hope that writing it down will free your mind of its burden. ❤
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I am hoping it will Kat xx
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❤️
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My body is just tingling with something – fear for you? Cringing? I don’t know what it is, but this was just so moving and vivid. It’s going to stick with me for a while.
(Also, thank you for all the smiling pictures. That you can smile after going through all that shows how strong you are.)
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Just when I think I have read the worst you throw me into the fire again. This is quite barbarous but your writing of it is really well crafted. Your voice grows and matures with each snippet you share. Thank you for sugaring the pill with the wonderful family album … it does not take away the feeling of agony but it brings a warm smile nonetheless xx
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Thanks so much Fiona! I hope you are enjoying your daughter’s company and relaxing xoxoxo
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Very much – thank you xxx
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The anxiety these memories must bring you. Hugs and kisses.
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Thank you Paula for reading and commenting. This one was hard and I felt ashamed to tell it but it was time xoxo
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Wow! I loved browsing the photos. They show love and resilience. So glad you can tell your story and put it on paper. It gives you a voice and it needs to be heard. The pain and anguish come through. It is good to know that you now have a bridge and have so many loved ones cheering you today. Love and hugs xoxox
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Thanks so much xoxoxo
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What a beautiful family you have! Your strength and resilience always amaze me. xoK
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Thank you K for continuing to read. xo
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OMG. Horrifying
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xoxoxoxo
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Holy Jesus, Lynn. Like someone else mentioned, it’s as if your photos are testimony to the sacrifices you’ve made in life. The feel-good juxtaposed with the not-so-good I have to tell you, I’d like to get one of his teeth on the end of my pliers. . . 🙂
You just go, girl!! Xoxoxo
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Thanks so much Carmen xoxoxo
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What a monster!
Leslie
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❤️❤️
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❤ ❤
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OMG!!!! I can’t…I just can’t say anything!
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❤️❤️❤️
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If not for the pictures of now, I would have a more difficult time processing the ‘then’.
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❤️❤️❤️
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And what a beautiful smile you have now! xoxoxo
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Xoxo thank you KR
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I hate this man so much!
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Xxxxx
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🌹🌹🌹
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I’m saddened. You and your little ones suffered such abuse. Thank you for sharing the photos of your wonderful family. ♥️
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Thank you sweet Holly x
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Looking at the photos take a bit of an edge off the pain.
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Thank you Peggy xx
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This made me shudder! I couldn’t have “liked” the post if the wonderful happy faces were not there.
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Thank you dear Mani x
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Really frightening…you must be proud to survive all that and have a family intact. Garfield hugs!
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I am for sure! Thank you
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I literally flinched when I read this. He is simply Evil. So very happy to see you and your family able to smile and be free of the tyranny. X
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Thank you so much xx
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Like so many others have commented here, I am so relieved that you and your family are safe now!! I have only read snippets here and there and that is enough to know you have been saved from an awful life. But you do have a beautiful family!!
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Thank you very much for reading and commenting! It means allot to me that people care
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Thank you for sharing your story.
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Xx
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Such lovely pictures and a beautiful family! You write beautifully and although the ending had me cringing I’m so happy you are in a better place😊 big hugs to you!
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Thanks marisa xx
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Oh my, Lynn. Sending you big hugs. What a horrible man. Keep looking at all those beautiful pictures of your family. You’re a strong woman, my friend. ❤ < 3
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❤️❤️❤️❤️
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I’m aghast. But your resilience shines through. Very well written
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Thanks so much dear friend x
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Oh Lynn, you know my feelings my friend.
I am so pleased you have found the light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for sharing all your beautiful family photo’s. Hugs xxx
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Xxxxxxxxx oo
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Lynn, I’m so happy that you no longer live in that toxic environment. Thanks for continuing to share your story. Your photos are great!!
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Thanks so much Cynthia
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Dental issues are bad enough but to not be able to handle it properly is worse. He definitely lacked compassion.
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He did
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Oh Lynn! When I think I have heard the worst – there is more. I am so glad it is in your past, and you can smile now. I know the pain will never be completely gone, but you are helping others with your story. Thank you.
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Thank you my dearest Jodi!! Xxxxxxx
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Oh my gosh! He didn’t even let you go to the dentist! Terrible! But the pictures are all so lovely! xoxoxox
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He would he claimed! But the kids needed things and I had to push to get those things so I knew this is how things had to be! I lost two teeth due to lack of dental care xxxx
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I’m so sorry to hear that Lynn. You should have gone to the dentist and he should have made sure you went to the dentist. xoxox
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Xxxxxx
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I knew that was a big no no and had to really push for basics more than usual. He offered many things but I knew it was not for real.
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That is so sad. I’m so glad you are away from him.
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Thank you PJ xx my kids are amazing and buy me gifts, spoil me, spend time with me and they are everything
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And I am sure you are everything to them. You have wonderful kids!!
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Thanks PJ xoxo
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xoxox
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Wow Lynz the thongs you had to endure! Glad life is much happier now!
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Thanks so much Gary!!
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I’m happy for you now, Lynn, there is much to smile about.
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So much! Xx
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For a moment I thought you had written a work of fiction and then the truth dawned on me . How brave and strong you were and are. Love K x
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Thank you k xx basically just tried to get by and get basics
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❤️
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Thank you for your bravery telling this. My prayer is always for your perfect healing from all these abuses. ❤
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This is powerful. I like the way you address yourself in the mirror and “you are still there”. The gallery of your smiling pictures and loving family offset the horror he brought into your life.
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Thank you ❤️❤️
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The early pictures of you and your sister are beautiful. I am glad you are home in the states. I can see why your daughters and sons are beautiful and take after you in looks, spirit, and song.
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Thank so much
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Wow………
But such wonderful, happy pictures of you and your family.
Your strength is amazing.
x 💕 x
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Thank you xx
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That was awful! It must have been terribly painful… So glad that you are free. I am for the family love you now enjoy.
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Thank you!
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Lynn, I felt physically sick reading the horror of the home-dentistry – I wished it had been fiction. Luckily the wonderful photo array of you and your smiling family at the start was still in my heart and mind … such a contrast to your earlier life. May you forever smile with impunity. hugs, my friend. xxxxxx
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Thank you sweet friend xxx
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Sad words, lightened by the lovely smiles!
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Thanks bette
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Beautiful family photos Lynn! I don’t know why I didn’t see that coming. It boggles my mind how a person can inflict so much pain on another person.
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Thanks for reading Steph!
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It’s always a pleasure Lynn<3
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If only……I cannot even finish this sentence as it would put me into a rant that probably would go on way to long….I am so happy your free, your in charge of you, no one else, you have such a wonderful support group around you….Lynn you really are my strength…no matter what I endured with the asshat I was married to, is nothing compared to what you endured. Sister keep your head held high and keep that beautiful smile bright and full of love……keep writing…..let it all out….its what was never to be again…..!!! love ya Lynn
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Thank you sister! I am trying to keep writing! I might put a poetry book out first. It is taking a long time and I hit places where I cannot write any more. Thanks for being there. Love you dear sis! xo
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How wonderful, your poems are lovely, I would certainly buy a book….its healthy to know when to stop and give yourself a break…good for you….don’t push yourself on that. its important to remain mentally healthy doing it….no anxiety to be stirred up while writing….its therapeutic, not detrimental….love ya….
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Thanks you are so right!
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Had to back track after reading the other post about abuse because I usually see your poetry and other posts. I applaud you for being open about this because that’s a very hard thing to do. You are showing how strong you are. Your story will help heal another person with similar story because when they see your words they will know they aren’t alone. Let there be only love and kindness in your life now 🙂
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You are so kind! Thank you very much
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He continues to stay in character. If he keeps this up, he will never be redeemed.
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xoxoxo thanks dear Karina
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Wonderful family gallery and lots of happy faces. Keep smiling!
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He really enjoyed inflicting pain, didn’t he. So glad you are free, now.
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Thanks so much
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