It seems simple to drift away and forget all of the things that I have to be grateful for. It is too easy to focus on the things that I want to happen such as losing weight, finishing my book and feeling totally back to the old me! At this point in my life it is the tiny things that bring me joy and the reminder of where I was last year, 5 years ago and even 10 years back.
It finally snowed on Friday and it is still snowing here and there. Saturday my son went to start the van and it would not start. Snow kept falling, gloomy weather brought wind and more snow and yet I sat snuggled warm under my blanket, not caring much! I have a spare truck that is old and has its own little issues but I was happy and content to have an extra vehicle. The thought of getting to the next little town for Mude’s wisdom tooth extraction on Monday (today) did loom overhead but no panic! I called the free service that my parents gift to me each year and they came and towed the van to a local mechanic shop. It sounds silly but it was fun to interact with the female tow truck driver and to watch how she got my van hauled away!
I was up at 4 a.m. this morning; I sat on my comfy couch, listened to Christmas music and watched the gently glowing lights. I thought of last year at this time and many years before that. It reminded me to be grateful for everything, even the tiny blessings that sometimes go unnoticed. I want to be as real as possible because I know other people struggle as well! This list is a hard one in many ways but here it is!
- I am grateful to have a good relationship with my children, to have their love and acceptance. It has been a long road and has not been easy, there have been ups and downs but they have always stuck by me even in the worst of times! They are truly amazing and are my heroes! I love each and every one of them with all that I have!
- I am grateful to be part of my grandkids lives, they are unique, kind, smart and a total joy! I never thought it would be like this but I have fallen in love again three times over! I thank their parents for involving me in special moments and for making sure I am a part of their lives.
- I am grateful to have daughter-in-laws who love my sons, who value our family and who have stuck with me through thick and thin!! They are truly part of our large loud family and bring their own special flare! Love you
- I am grateful to have my mom and dad who have always been there for me and for my kids. They are the best parents!
- I am grateful to have an extra vehicle.
- I am grateful to have the free towing service.
- I am grateful that my son can have his wisdom teeth taken care of. Two of my kids had this procedure done in Saudi and it was very difficult!!
- I am grateful for the snow and the gloomy weather, it is gorgeous.
- I am grateful for being able to cook! I made manicotti yesterday, Apricot chicken the day before and so on! Yeah!
- I am grateful that I can wear my winter coat each and every time I go out!!Last year I got my winter coat dirty by a simple daily action and then would not wear it. I bundled up in multiple shirts and sweaters to go out and grab a coffee with Foof. She would pick me up and inquire about my coat, I made excuses and felt guilt, shame. I was unable to take my daily walks outside with no warm coat! Now each day I grab my coat and put it on.
- I am grateful that I can take a walk around the block without ever looking back.
- I am grateful that I can play with my grandkids and not worry about possibly giving them some illness.
- I am grateful that I am back to blogging!
- Little things have fallen, broken such as a lightbulb, a plate and it did not bring hours of cleanup. I swept and disposed of the broken pieces. So grateful for this!
- I dream of him often which is hard but I try to put it into perspective and not let it ruin my day.
- I am grateful for the holidays, lights, our tree and decorations.
- I am grateful that I can make my own coffee even if it is hard some days.
- I am grateful that I can calm myself down when I get nervous.
- I am grateful that I am starting to gain self-worth.
- I am grateful that I can take medication for a headache if needed, before this was very difficult and involved endless worry and often panic. I would not take anything and spent hours with a pounding headache.
- I am grateful that I am able to help myself!
- I am grateful that while I still have issues with eating properly, I no longer have a more serious eating disorder!!! This is hard to admit!
- Finally I am grateful that I can celebrate any holiday I choose to and not feel that I am doomed for doing so. I am so grateful for each and every friend I have made here, thank you for your support and kindness!