True life story–Naivete

Writing a book is hard work! At this point it is a huge mess, pages of miss matched stories and free writing. I am proud that I have stuck to my writing days and to leaving home to get some focus. I thought I would take a break and do a short story for the blog and to attend Senior Salon,  Haddon Musings   This story is set in 2002, when residents of the Western compound were forced to move out. We had lived there for 6 years and it was finally time to leave.

Management made the announcement, residents would need to empty the compound and make other living arrangements. A large sum of money was given to employees and within weeks everyone would be vacating their homes. Neighbors and friends toured various residential facilities and scrambled to find a suitable replacement. He displayed genuine interest and we trailed behind him searching for a new residence. Each day he carted us along to upscale apartments, new homes and modern compounds and insisted that the ultimate decision was in my hands. I naively perused brochures, asked residential managers for advice and thoughtfully prepared for the move.

I tossed the last box onto a stack of ragged cardboard and remembered similar ones that had stood lined along the villa wall years before. This house was a far cry from where we had started, an empty, unfurnished villa in Riyadh. It was also lacking the finishing touches and amenities that we had grown accustomed to on the compound. White rusted bars framed the window and jagged metal wire held pieces of dining room chairs into place. I felt a twinge of guilt remembering my defiant and ungrateful attitude when he chose this place. Although I had learned that voicing my opinion was futile and ultimately brought more anguish to our household, this time a bitter fury spilled out and could no longer be contained. Enough money had been supplied for our family to move to a similar setting but this was seen as a waste and a luxury. I had defiantly and almost mockingly it seemed, accepted his words at face value and when forced to agree with his choice willingly, a resounding opposition rang out. Several days of insubordination were met with fiery silence and warnings of what was to come. I finally conformed and agreed that yes this was surely the best place for our family. Tears welled up as I held the last box, cut the tape and broke it down just as I had for each and every one, but somehow this one was different, unique. It signaled the finality of this move and all that it entailed. We would once again be on our own, living outside of the Western compound that had been our home for the past 6 years.The confines of the compound walls had not only been lacking in our standard isolation, but also inclusive, providing  furniture, mini mart, recreation center and transportation. It was the most normal environment that we had resided in and as Osama solemnly reminded me, we would once again be on our own, left to fend for ourselves.

 

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114 thoughts on “True life story–Naivete

      1. At 1/3rd I knew that-greed, anger, lack of compassion. Love You too my dear friend. xoxo b-2
        Writing a book is labor intensive Lynn-Outline the 16 years there. From first arriving 8 months pregnant to first (sad) residence. That is after the introduction of who is Lynn-how was she raised and by whom. School years, meeting him, the “Secret marriage” first few years before being lured to Saudi Arabia, et cetera. It then will not be so over-whelming. Okay!!! xoxoxo b-2

        Liked by 3 people

  1. The moment where you break the last box down and the reader understands what it actually means is very powerful. Writing is hard work. But you are doing it. Be very very proud of yourself …. I think you know that xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I barely read the comments but this time, I did. They all state all the things that are going through my mind and heart…. from idiot to loneliness and isolation. It shows so well how far you have come. Hard to imagine that you bore that for so long!

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  3. Glad to hear that you are writing despite all the hard work it entails. I’m looking forward to reading your book.

    I can’t even imagine how difficult that phase of your life must’ve been for you, so happy that you are much better off now! You are a strong woman, Lynz!

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  4. Hi Lynn, I can only echo the above comments! Your writing is very compelling and does draw us in wanting to know more….! I would definitely start at the begging and let the story unravel til the time you you managed to escape his clutches. I sometimes wonder if he reads your blog and realizes the cruelty he showed his family!! Big hugs Lynn xoxo

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      1. You could talk now till doomsday and he will NEVER grasp his cruelty Lynn, that is the realization of this situation for you and many others. That is why it is so very important to share your story so others know a perpetrator! Plus…a massive IDIOT! I hope he does read this blog then comes to Florida for a real rude awakening. I have said that many times and I mean it. HIS way or the highway, thankfully you had enough and found the courage to leave and stay on US soil…Courage to do the best thing for you and those 9 children. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo b-2

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      2. You are so wonderful dearest bestie! I feel anxious and then think the book is just ridiculous, but you guys keep me moving on it. Talking about the importance of this book Cheryl, it makes me feel more motivation.I tend to forget why I am doing this! I wish that any woman who is in that situation would possibly read and then realize it was not them. I thought I had a huge problem, in the end I sat leaking tears, a wreck, not knowing which way was up or down! I was so mixed up and so scared! so, yes you are right my friend, it is important to speak out!!!!!! Thanks so much for reminding me that is the reason for me doing this!!!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo much love

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      3. Not only that aspect Lynn but as therapy for you to know in your heart of heart that you are not at fault. What you are is a SURVIVOR! Continue on but do not put pressure on yourself. Small story snippets of life as you shared today bring it to life for people because it is so real! I will continue to support you and encourage you and I know truly ho important this is.xoxoxoxo b-2 Hugs and Love back to you!!!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I probably should not ever hold your physical book in my hand! I want to rip a piece out of the computer, so I might just burn down my trailer, if I had paper to burn!!
    OF COURSE he made money off the move! ARGH I got so burned up that you and your children had to endure living with such an awful person!! and with such violence, and abuse.

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  6. There was no winning in that situation, Lynn.

    And so glad you’re working on your book. Yes, it’s hard. Whoever said writing a book is easy, probably never tried to write a book! Above all, just have fun with it. When it stops being fun, take a break. There’s no deadline 🙂

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  7. This was something I could picture, his cruelty to act like you had a choice when you had absolutely NO choices! Argh! I worked at a battered women’s shelter and could only take it 18 months, standing up for the children’s rights as a child advocate. Your loving care, meals and heart show towards your children plus intelligence passed on to them helped survival be your ending triumph! ❤ 🙂

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  8. Lynn! Riveting as always – and just so, so sad that it is a true story. None of this was your fault, and you did the best you could at every step of the way. My wish is that writing this book will help purge you of *his* energy that continues to plague.. You are beautiful, smart and strong…no matter what happened in the past. love and hugs to you always ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Your piece is well constructed. Your writing invites the reader to step into your shoes and feel your anger building up. You are telling your own gut-wrenching story. It is filled with your pain. And it will make a compelling book for your readers. Stick to your memories and let your gift of telling your story take your book where it will. Hang in there. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I am so excited that you are writing a book Lynn! This is such a sad post, but I am glad I know how everything has ended up! You went through so much and had to keep the peace for so many years. It is terrible that you to be isolated again.

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      1. Your blog posts are alive and would set the tone. I wondered whether anyone who had been through it with you, or heard of it on your trips home, would have an important perspective. And your early life should not be forgotten

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Great piece Lynn. This is the past, and going back with all this in your mind, cannot be easy, but it hopefully soothes your soul and is good therapy for you in the long run. You have come so far from then, so proud of you my friend. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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